11.01.2008 | By: Alisa Callos


“Betty, you’ll never believe what I just heard.”

“Marge. I swear you always have the most delicious gossip. Do tell.”

“I was just down at Truman’s Department store—getting David some new shoes—and I ran into Doctor Bakers nurse. You know Helen…she never could keep a secret to save her life. Well! You will never believe. I mean never, believe what she just told me.”


“Deputy Scott is pregnant!”

“Really? Our first woman sheriff’s deputy and she’s not even married. A fine example to the community she’s setting.”

“I know. But that’s not even the best part.”

“It gets better?”

“Unbelievably. You know all the training courses she was supposedly going to up in Portland?”

“Uh huh.”

“Well. Seems she decided she would rather get pregnant on the county dime. Helen said she went out every night—looking for a sperm donor! She picked the best-looking fella she could find and asked if she could have his baby. Can you believe it? The nerve. I mean really! It’s absolutely scandalous!

This very short sketch is, with a few details changed, based upon a scandal I remember from childhood. At the time, the thought that a woman would go to a bar and pick a father for her baby was shocking. That she would do so with a gay man was even more so. She had two babies with him, went on to marry, and as far as I know, had a wonderful life.

In today’s society, very few things scandalize anymore. Think about it. A president’s affair? Nope. Your priest’s love of little boys? Nope. Your congressional representative soliciting sex in the airport bathroom? Nope. Your Wall Street banker causing the economy to crash? Nope. What would truly scandalize you?


gautami tripathy said...

She did as best she could manage.....


Kill Word Verification

keiths ramblings said...

Nice piece, especially your foot-note. Mind you, I did come across some scandal, but you'll have to visit my blog to find out about it!

Rinkly Rimes said...

In 'the old days' life was a lot more exciting because so many more things were scandalous!

paisley said...

it certainly has become more difficult to shock us... but never cease to be amazed at the things people will try!!!!! great post!!

missalister said...

Your final question comes close to a blurb I was toying with for this SS exercise. Yeah, what would be so shocking in today’s society, so shocking it’d be a true scandal? I’m working hard here… It’d have to be really close to a belief we still hold strongly enough to… And that’s rare anymore… Maybe incest would get it... I think cousins marrying would upset far fewer than such a thing would have in the past, but a sister and brother, say? Ewwww, now that freaks me out big time!

"Sunshine" said...

Interesting juxtaposition of the fictionalized story and the true account. I agree with the others that our views of scandal change with time, but I think people will always go out of their way to find drama. Great post!

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